So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
