i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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