i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Terrible idea I love it
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
