I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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