Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize