I heard we made out
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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