Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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