Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
