Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
