Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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