our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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