It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
