Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize