it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
