Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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