Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize