i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
