Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She bit a glass in half.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize