and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
