I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
