So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
