Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
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