i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
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