I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
