The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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