i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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