i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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