lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
