We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
