Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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