I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
