Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize