Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
