Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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