i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
