We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
