Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Less talking, more tequila
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
