glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
