Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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