Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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