he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize