you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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