im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Enjoy the penises
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
