worst night to have a conscience
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
