Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
