so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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