we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
