Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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