I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
