Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
