Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
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