Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
