i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
