I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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